Untitled Poem

Eyes so deep, overflowing with secrets
A tear filled with a hundred years of pain
Does time matter?
Excruciating memories, forget the past
Forget the good memories too
It just leads to the ones you bury deep
A heart stitched up, rip it open
Remember the smile, the playful child
The heartfelt warmth, the fascination of touch
Touch, human touch, excruciatingly painful
Bring back the pain, bring it all back
Blood all around me, drowning me,
High pitched screams
My scars go so deep, so far down
Attempts to stitch it up again, but I’m broken
So sharp, so sharp, it pieces
Through my body, it cancels my brain
Hands reach out to the sky, fingers grasping
To the light, to the light
Why?
Regretting the choice not to jump
Bite my tongue, hold my breath
Lost the chance
To die on my own terms
Not from these dirty hands, pulling
Hitting, bruising, hurting,
Shattered, I wish for numbness
Yet I feel it all
Filthy, spit smeared over my face
I will forever be haunted by his eyes
It mirrors mine, so deep
a need to cause pain, alleviate his own
Yet it never goes away
He whispers, so hungrily
“You want this, you want this so bad.”
High pitched screams.

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